Posted in authentic, choice, courage, differences, Emotional, faith, Family, friend, friends, grandparent, happy, job, joy, laugh, life, live, old, peace, sister, strength, woman, Women in My Life

A Bench Mark Weekend

This past weekend was a reunion with three of my high school classmates.  We recalled those days many years ago, and laughed all weekend.  Endless fun, without any men, children, work, alcohol, or drugs.   High on life.  I have had the need to connect to my childhood outside of my family of origin.  So much is a fog, just glimpses of faces and scenarios.  The past class reunions are minus familiar friendly faces. We had about 500 graduates in our class.  So I sought three classmates I am connected to on Facebook, where we seem to share the same interests and connect with our comments on each other’s posts.   I remember well all three.  One friend is an authentic pal from elementary school, another is quite the comedian then and now, and the other illuminates peace to anyone in her surroundings.

We reserved the entire country inn in a small town.  The host and hostess accommodated us well with a bonfire, plenty of bedding options, and a delicious breakfast.  We grabbed lunch first at a unique BBQ diner with a resident pig sleeping in a stall.  After lunch we stopped at a local antique store.  The antiques were as old as us.  We visited Big Spring, a natural spring in the Ozarks of Missouri.  I came across a metal disc right on the cliff ledge near the spring flowing from the Current River.  It said “U.S. Geological Survey Bench Mark”.  According to Wikipedia, “the USGS (United States Geological Survey) was created, by a last-minute amendment, to an act of  Congress on March 3, 1879. It was charged with the ‘classification of the public lands, and examination of the geological structure, mineral resources, and products of the national domain’. This task was driven by the need to inventory the vast lands added to the United States by the Louisiana Purchase in 1803 and the Mexican-American War in 1848.”  This bench mark has some kind of significance, probably either a elevation or earthquake marker.  My curiosity will have me research until I know the facts.

Benchmark at Big Spring

I felt like this was a bench mark weekend for me.  I had never done this, invited old childhood friends to gather for an overnight.  We all did not hangout together as a gang in high school, but knew each other.  None of us belonged to cliques.  I felt a bond would form as we came together now.  I have gone on women’s retreats, but this was a different kind of retreat.  This weekend rendezvous confirmed we had so much in common.  Growing up in the 60’s and 70’s.  Childhoods and schools in St. Charles County, Missouri.  Troubled love relationships.  Divorce.  Made better choices with age and wisdom.  Faith.  Caretaking.  Deceased parents.  Mourning.  Parenthood.  Grand-mothering.  Jobs.  Thrift.  Hobbies.  Strength.  A confident beauty that a 59-year old woman possesses despite it all.  The differences were fewer.  We share a sisterhood.  The “plump sisters (PS)” vow to meet up again in about 3 or 4 months for another destination, maybe another bench mark weekend.

“Because there’s one thing stronger than magic: sisterhood.”
~ Robin Benway, The Extraordinary Secrets of April, May, & June

Posted in battle, change, failure, faith, fall, God, Jesus, life, strength, victory, words

And I Believe

Be At Rest
“You Say” is written and sung by Lauren Daigle and co-written by Paul Mabury, and Jason Ingram.  This song comes out of my desk radio in my office every weekday.  Some days I stop and think about the lyrics.  Today I was overcome by tears.  How far God has brought me from a place where I forgot who I was.  And The Father is faithful to remind me every day, and most days I hear His words.  The Grace of our Lord Jesus is endless.
I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I’m not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low?
Remind me once again just who I am, because I need to know (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity, (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh, I believe
Taking all I have and now I’m laying it at Your feet
You have every failure God, and You’ll have every victory, (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
Oh I believe (I), yes I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh I believe (oh)
Posted in angels, answer, body, challenges, daughter, faith, Family, friend, God, health, hope, live, pain, Physical, Prayer, sorrow, strength

Like Gold

I have been making “liquid gold” for many years.  Nowadays they call it “bone broth”.  According to online resources “bone broth” was used in ancient Chinese medicine to improve connective tissues, kidney function, and immunity.  I simply roast a whole chicken, turkey breast, or a bone-in beef or pork roast in the slow-cooker on low heat for 10 – 12 hours. Adding a fermented liquid such as wine, beer, kombucha, or vinegar in water helps bring out the bone marrow and collagen from the bones into the simmering liquid in the slow-cooker.  Liquid gold. Good for my physical health. That liquid gold is the base for delicious soups and sauces.

My oldest daughter, Rachel received another type of liquid gold this week.  After many years of prayers, tears, and seeking answers from the conventional medical field.  Her name came up finally after a couple of years on the wait list for a California clinic that uses alternative medical treatments for her disabling conditions.  Rachel is challenged with degenerative disc disease and adhesive arachnoiditis.  She lives in pain constantly.  This past year, Rachel has had physicians tell her “there is nothing I can do for you”.  Faith and hope has been her strength .  Those moments when she lost hope she had friends and family still believing.  Faith has sustained her.  Our God sustains Rachel.  An out-of-state trip orchestrated by God Himself unfolded before our eyes, giving hearts melted, funds gathered, plane tickets ordered, and an appointed physician who prays for each of her patients. Today the neighborhood church bells ring at this noon hour, an angelic sound reminds me of our God’s faithfulness.  Angels continue to watch over my Rachel.

 

Posted in blessings, challenges, cry, die, differences, friend, God, hurt, joy, laugh, live, pain, strength, worry

The Strength In “Today”

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength,” Corrie Ten Boom is quoted.  What keeps you from enjoying this present moment? Is it worry about meeting bills or a sick loved one?  Too many projects to accomplish in the day, maybe well into those night hours?  If you read carefully the quoted words above, strength is found in “today”.  “Today” is a mighty word.  Literally means “on the day”, “at this day”, “from-day”, “in day” in several languages.  Present day, present moment.

Maybe today is not so good.  In physical pain.  Hurting on the inside.  A relationship needs to be patched of its differences.  Saying “goodbye” to a beloved friend or family pet.  Present moment seems to be a challenge.

These are lyrics by Randy Sparks and made known by John Denver’s voice:

Today, while the blossoms still cling to the vine
I’ll taste your strawberries, I’ll drink your sweet wine

A million tomorrows shall all pass away
‘Ere I forget all the joy that is mine, today

I can’t be contented with yesterday’s glory
I can’t live on promises winter to spring
Today is my moment, now is my story
I’ll laugh and I’ll cry and I’ll sing

Today, while the blossoms still cling to the vine
I’ll taste your strawberries, I’ll drink your sweet wine
A million tomorrows shall all pass away
‘Ere I forget all the joy that is mine, today

 Embrace the full of joy of TODAY despite all the rest…God’s blessings are yours always.
Posted in authors, book, comfort, Emotional, faith, Financial, forgiveness, God, happy, husband, Mental, pain, patient, Physical, sad, Spiritual, strength, thankful, weep, woman, words, write

Women, Stories, Faith, and Heart Matters

“Women’s stories matter.  They tell us who we are, they give us places to explore our problems, to try on identities and imagine happy endings.  They entertain us, they divert us, they comfort us when we’re lonely or alone.  Women’s stories matter.  And women matter, too.” ~ Jennifer Weiner

I read many literary pieces authored by famous and not so famous women.  Women have many untold stories, happy, and sad ones, too.  There is a time to share those stories, and other times to be quiet.  A time to work through heart matters in solitude.  Inspirational writer Ann Voskamp asks in her book Be The Gift, “Are the most painful tears the kind no one can see, the kind where your soul weeps alone?”  This is where God meets us, holds us, hugs us, comforts, allowing the tears to flow until no more.  Empty oneself of all.  In the midst of physical pain, mental anguish, sudden illness, chronic health conditions, death, wrongful accusations, troubled relationships, mean co-workers, political wars, poverty, domestic violence, or complete exhaustion, faith has to play a part to get through it.

But also, “faith has to be exercised in the midst of ordinary, down-to-earth living,” writes Elisabeth Elliot.  “Faith without works is dead,” the Holy Scriptures tell us.  “Faith is built out of small acts along the path of life,” Maria Shiver shares in her new book, I’ve Been Thinking … Today, what small act strengthened your faith, your belief in God and His creation?  And that creation is you, too.  Was it surrendering your curse words to thankfulness?  Was it a smile shared with that co-worker who loathes your presence?  Was faith exercised in giving your lunch money to the homeless lady sitting on the bench?  How about when you wrote an encouragement letter to that relative estranged from the family?  The tenth time to patiently point out a grammatical error to the simple-minded teen?  Scrubbing the stains off the wall made by careless guests?  Forgiving the thoughtless comment from your husband?  When you forget another appointment, but reschedule and mark it on your calendar this time?  The lists goes on how we exercise faith in others, God, and ourselves.

We women have stories, and faith to make the stories go on about real heart matters. Heart Key Hole

 

 

Posted in daughter, day, Elisabeth, Family, forgiveness, God, grace, house, mother, Prayer, Rachel, strength, thankful, Warrior, Women in My Life

Sweep The Front Porch

 

I awoke this Saturday morn early like most days.  Weekday, weekend, it no matter.  I am an early bird. And you know the saying “the early bird gets the worm”, but I am sure worms are not on my menu.  But time with God is.  Yes, I can talk to God (and you can, too) at any time of day under any circumstances.  But there is something fresh about the dawn of a new day, quietness and stillness in the house and just outside the house on my front porch.  I sit on the porch bench watching the day wake up around me.  I am surrounded by shade trees, pots of perennials, the tweeting birds, and garden art.  The breeze subtly chills my skin, and rustles the green canopy of leaves.  Forgiveness I ask for my shortcomings, and His Grace accepted.  Petitions are expressed, asking God for complete healing for my daughters, Elisabeth and Rachel as well as my aging mother.  Strength for this woman warrior and my day.  With a thankful heart …

 

Onward to begin the Saturday chores … I sweep the front porch of the twigs, mulch, dog hairs, and dirt blown in with the summer winds.  It is an attempt to keep my home tidy.  I want to feel welcomed when I come home.  Rather be greeted by the warm cinnamon front door, than dirt and grime.  I am sure the rest of the family and our guests do as well.  Is that not what praying to God is about?  Sweeping the wrong motives, ill words, and bad attitudes away while being received in His warm embrace.  An Open Door.  So happy I chose a comforting color for the front door.  Cinnamon.  Warm.   This morn it invites me into the house to prepare a pancake breakfast and finish those other Saturday chores, and pray all the while.

Posted in day, depression, God, grace, jealousy, life, love, mind, peace, Prayer, resources, strength

At The End Of The Day

Life is too short to sit idle, hate others, be jealous or depressed, and play mind games.  With God’s grace, sincerity and a pure heart is what I desire to become.  “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.”  Psalms 51:10.  Pure and as sweet as honey.  White as snow.  No bargains made or motives conjured up.  Just live for my Creator.  I answer to my God at the end of the day, every day.  And every day is a gift.  At the end of the day, I take in account how I spent those precious minutes, my God-given talents, supply of resources and energy?  Is my time consumed in front of a screen, iphone-size or mega flat screen TV-size?  Size of the electronic does not matter, just how did I personally connect to those around today?  Did I pick-up my neighbor’s storm-tossed trash scattered across his yard, encourage my co-worker on her new project, smile at that smelly stranger on the street bench, or pick-up the phone to talk to my kin living a few hundred or 2 miles away?  Everyone has something they are good at.  My energy levels may be up or plummeted down or be sporadic.   Did I use whatever today’s strength is to extend God’s love and grace?   Did I pray and be a vessel for peace or healing?  At the end of the day …