“Still round the corner there may wait a new road or a secret gate.” ~ J.R.R. Tolkien
Hard work can be disguised in a hobby. Passion and interest can occupy one’s attention, energy, and time. One starts on a project of great detail. Maybe a cup or two of coffee or tea to keep the momentum going. Then 5, 6, or 8 hours later you are scrambling for a bite to eat and cannot believe what time it is. This is how it has been with baking, gardening, birdwatching, crafting, reading, and writing for me. New brain pathways travelled, mysteries are discovered, prayers said, challenges are overcome, and beauty is found in whatever has been created.
“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” ~ Thomas Edison
Still round the corner awaits another adventure. One that God has placed in my life, your life. A path waiting to be uncovered and walked on. There are bends and forks in the road, and the Holy Spirit is our guide and protector. With eyes of faith an atelier at the cottage here or elsewhere is in the making. A place designated to work on these projects the heart has passion for. A place of our own to create and bless others with God’s gifts. What is around your corner?
It has been a summer touched by St. Francis, St. Joseph, and St. Ignatius. Their lives still live in God’s people today including in me. A stray puppy became a part of my husband and I’s life one week in August before finding the perfect family to adopt him. After several weeks of packing, donating, moving, repairing, scrubbing, and just plain hard work, we finally put my mother’s villa on the market with the St. Joseph statue buried in the yard. Several willing buyers offered contracts more than what we asked for within 24 hours of being on the market. The closing is in a couple of weeks. Meanwhile, Dean and I have some major household upgrades. We replaced a furnace well over 20 years old, a roof maybe as old, and gutters failing their job even when removing leaves and debris on several occasions this spring and summer. We have had plenty of rain even over the summer. One wall was showing some leakage during a storm prior to the roof and gutters being replaced, so some plaster work will be next. St. Joseph intercedes while God oversees the details.
“Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will, all I have and call my own. You have given all to me. To you, Lord, I return it. Everything is yours; do with it what you will. Give me only your love and your grace, that is enough for me.” ~ St. Ignatius of Loyola
I awoke one day singing from my heart the spiritual song, Take, Lord, Receive. I sang all day long, beginning with my shower and while I worked around the house that day. This song is based on the quote above from St. Ignatius, co-founder of the Jesuit teachings and Spiritual Exercises. I knew I was singing this for someone else besides me. A phone call from one of the kids revealed who. But the words welled up in my heart for myself, too. A yielding I need right now. A yielding of my own heart matters. Worry about things I cannot control, anxiety about the future of those I love, and my lack of understanding for some of God’s people placed in my life. Take, Lord, receive. My liberty, my memory, my understanding, my entire will. All I have and call my own … To You, Lord, I return it. Everything is Yours. Do with it what You will. Please Lord, give me only Your love and Your grace, that is enough for me. Amen.”
I am a planner by nature and vocation. Letting things go for a whole day is not easy. I think the Lord designed the Sabbath for a reason. I am not faithful to take that day of rest each week. And it catches up sooner or later. I have a quiet time each day where I meditate, pray, and just sit in the quiet. But a whole day of this refreshes my body and mind. My spirit needed it, too.
At my little cottage house I created my boudoir, designed with a comfortable chaise and vintage forget-me-nots such as comfy pillows, a lace-paneled screen, brimmed hats, scarves, hosiery, aprons, gloves, a pearl-beaded clutch, and special evening attire. It is tucked in one corner of my husband and I’s large bedroom. I turned on the mood lights picking green to illuminate my boudoir matching the plush green outside the window this summer season. It invited me for an afternoon nap, a day of rest from my weariness. The dark memories of days from over 20 years ago fainted away. “Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.” ~ Psalms 116:7. The pitter-patter of the rain on the window panes serenaded me to sleep.
A week’s vacation is finally coming next week. And a retreat may be in order for this autumn. But also a sabbatical. Traditionally, this is a 1-year recess for every 7 years worked. I cannot see this happening until I retire from full-time employment. So maybe a whole month off next summer, before I move into another chapter of my life’s work?
Three or four days of my work week I am able to break away from the St. Louis County benefits office located in the middle of Clayton’s business district where buses, delivery trucks, cars, financial institutions, niche shops, eateries, entrepreneurs, visitors, and government employees blend. These 1-hour get-aways can include lunch in or out, meditation and prayer at the corner church, possibly a catnap in a quiet loveseat down the hall, and almost always a walk. Today I brought lunch from home, egg salad made with white bean hummus (yum!) and whole wheat crackers. Afterwards I took my daily stroll. I chose to leave my cell phone and water bottle behind, my security usually a tote on my constitutionals. It is a brisk 50 degrees this cloudy March Friday. I can survive without H2O for 20 minutes. And the cell phone, what did I do for the first 4-1/2 decades of my life without one?!
I have my Fitbit on, but do not check it during this short walk. Besides I have these Clayton blocks memorized, either 3000, 2000, or 1000 steps depending on what direction, destination, and how far I decide to go. I made a conscious effort to be present moment on today’s walk. Four blocks north of my office and back. The church bells chimed louder. Other pedestrians’ voices and footsteps were clearer. I was aware of how many people waited at each of the traffic lights with me, what shoes and jacket they wore, and the colors of the vehicles that passed through the intersection before the crosswalk signal switched. The birds chirped feverishly. Flowers popped out at me as if I was the sun.
In contrast, I feel the sharp, damp air on my face, hands, and the tops of my feet. My joints ache, but this provokes me to keep moving these arthritic parts, and not stifle what God has created. “I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I know this clearly.” Along that thought … What have I been created for these later autumn years of my life? I think of the human life span as the seasons. Spring is my childhood. Summer is my young adult up to mid-life years. Autumn is my mid-life up to retirement. And the winter will be retirement and elderly years. See how the cold, moist air on my arthritic joints brought me to thoughts of my future retirement during this walk? It is a challenge for this planner and organizer to stay present moment. Yesterday my heart’s desires bubble up among projects and schedules. A sketch of the next 5 years came to me. I have been asking God what am I to do after employee wellness and benefits at the County. Only 132 weeks until my retirement to be possible. I give tomorrow’s blueprints to God, my Creator.
Back to present moment … thankful … for this moment to walk, breathe, love, and live fully.
Woman Warrior 